Is Swipe Dating Culture Healthy?
Swipe dating apps were originally designed to be quick hook-up apps. Swipe dating forces everyone to make a quick and superficial decision, setting the tone for a quick encounter. The intentional “gamified” aspect of swipe dating makes it fun in the short term, but many swipe daters describe feeling degraded and depressed in the long term. In this way, swipe dating is like an addictive drug; the fun of the “game” makes it appealing to start and difficult to stop, but the long-term effects tend to be emotionally harmful.
There is also another very important element to the psychology of swiping that most people don’t consider. The easiest way to explain it is to analogize it to the real world. When any one of us walks into a place, naturally there will be people that we find attractive and may be interested in and people we are not interested in or attracted to. We do not get to swipe them out of the universe. Regardless of our personal attraction, these are real people, with real feelings, real lives, real heartbeats -- just like all of us. The action of swiping people away is similar to touching an apple or avocado that you don’t want at a grocery store and throwing it back into the pile, even watching it fall to the floor. It truly commoditizes people. But we are not fruit. This is not a natural action for the human brain to do or process in an interaction with another human being.
What Are Important Questions We Should Ask Ourselves Before Putting Ourselves Out There?
The first question one must ask oneself is what am I looking for? Dating is very personal to each individual. This is where a robust profile is very powerful for our members. They can communicate their desires which in turn will save them time and energy.
The next question is what do I have to offer? It is important for everyone to be honest with themselves before meeting other singles. Honesty is key. If you are a serious adult interested in a real relationship, you will save yourself a lot of time and energy if you are honest from the beginning.
Another important question is does the environment/company that I associate with support my lifestyle and beliefs? For example, I have twin boys. The last thing I would want them to do is put themselves in an environment where they are muted until pre-selected. I want them, just like I want all women, to be able to make the first move if that is what they desire. It is important to associate yourself with exactly what you believe. If you believe in equality, then you should include yourself in environments that treat every person equally at all times. This is Neumate.
The final important question is are you ready? Dating can be tough and disappointing and also fun and exciting. Ghosting is a weak response commonplace today, especially among the young swiping crowd, and if you are going to put yourself out there, you need to be prepared to shake it off. Anyone ghosting instead of communicating doesn’t deserve your attention or energy.
Why Do We Need Love From A Psychologist’s Perspective?
Humans have a need for meaning in life, and the two sources of meaning are work, i.e., productive activity that makes a contribution to society, and love. Romantic love not only provides meaning directly, but it also creates opportunities for other meaningful relationships, e.g., parenting children.